Foreshortening Disasters, Part 1

OK, maybe the foreground hand isn't totally wrong, but what the hell is going on with his other arm? And his midsection? This looks like at least 5 different photos were used, which, if you're counting, is generally 3 too many.

On the bright side, at least it's not comedy white, nor Futura XB.

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Some things are better left uncovered

Sometimes you hear a cover and go to yourself, "hey, that's doper than Sam Perkins at Woodstock." Other times, you wonder (possibly aloud) "that no talent hack! They couldn't even carry [inset original artist here]'s guitar case!" [Ed. note: You should have seen what the author originally wanted to use as the carried item. Believe us, it wasn't a guitar case.] Today was an example of the second. Some fool whose name I cannot even spare the mental RAM for, has covered "High and Dry" by the esteemed Radiohead. This is up there. With the worst covers of all time. Some songs just don't ever need to be covered. Like this one. And like "It's My Life" by Talk Talk. But No Doubt did a decent job with that one, although they crapped all over it with that video. This one today was bad. When you do a cover, you're supposed to bring something to it. Maybe your sound is similar to the original artist's, an...

How to write like a gossip columnist

Anyone can do it! Just keep in mind to never use your source's name, and always play up a celebrity's reaction to something using the following words: Blast Slam Fuming Here's an example: "Latigo Flint blasted reports that his guns do not actually fire live ammunition." Use them in combination!: "Gil slammed fellow carnie Sal's insinuation that he got a bit too personal with a badger. "It was cold and he wasn't even there!" the one-eyed Whack 'em Cats operator fumed." That's right, kiddies. Anyone can write a gossip column. And with the internet, anyone can publish it, too! p.s. Don't forget to put a salacious slant on everything. And blow things out of proportion, too. In fact, you may want to change your middle name to that.

Moroccan food is good. Who knew?

If you're looking for something a little different, and you're in the Fairfax district of LA, check out Chameau . It's this cute little moroccan restaurant. It's a little pricey and a little loud, but the food is good and the decor righteously hip. They're serving alcohol these days, contrary to outdated reports that they are BYOB. Some friends took us there Friday night. The appetizers are to die for. The deep fried mussels with yogurt dressing are sublime. Eat it, you'll like it.

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