Tuesday, April 26, 2005

TMQ Lives!

Ok, that headline could be cooler. Just imagine that it's 40 years ago. And that you're in a NYC subway. And instead of reading a blog, you're reading some graffiti. And instead of "TMQ", it says "Frodo".

...

Alright, it was a stretch. Sue me. I've got Barry White as my legal counsel. This is exciting news. I'm so excited I need to go beat on Kid Mayo with my Titanium Pimpstick™.

Some thoughts

After watching some (OK, a lot) of the opening weekend of the NBA's second season, some things occurred to me.

• Is George Clooney trying to compete with his buddy Brad by doing Budweiser VOs? WTF?

• The new Bulls are fun to watch, but watch out for Ben Gordon if they start losing again.

• Do the movie/playoff tie-in promos that TNT does really work? I'm not sure that this is the right venue for Kingdom of Heaven.

• The adidas commercials are works of art, but somebody please tell me what they have to do with the shoes. The shoes are intelligent? Does that mean they understand the ads?

• Enough with the pouty looks after you score and get fouled. If you're trying to look intense, it's not working. You look like you just chomped on a lemon. Score, pump your fist and be done with it. Stop trying to look like you've just had every member of your family insulted and your hometown invaded by locusts. It's just basketball.

• Ahmad Rashad owns the NBA behind-the-scenes/personal interest story.

• The XXX 2: Electric Boogaloo tie-ins are not going to help, but it still may open bigger than H2G2. [sigh]

• The Heat: Shaq 2.0. Kobe who?



There are new Halo 2 maps out there. Go and get them.



Also, I will be in NYC Saturday the 7th, so mark your calendars, mmm-K?

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Now if they were offering Corellian ale, I might just show

Apparently my home town Fan Force is lining up for the midnight showing of Star Wars Episode III: ROTS. The odd thing about midnight showings or any late night movie viewing in Anchorage is that it's still light when you exit the theater. This can take some getting used to. (This only applies during the summer months, BTW.)

The really sad thing about this is that the line is almost guaranteed to be better than the movie. This one's still going to suck, boys and girls. Great effects and awesome Jedi action will be melded together with mind-numbingly dull (and pointless) politics, bad writing and possibly worse acting by most involved. I saw the last one in the theater and the highlight was hands down the 5 minute lightsaber battle before the movie started, put on by a couple of fans in costume with plastic sabers in hand. They had some great moves and generated more applause than anything in the 2 hours of pain than followed.

Of course, I will be seeing this conclusion in the theatre. How can I not? This doesn inspire some level of self-loathing, though. I will be spending the whole time trying to think about that Lucas has said that he wants to re-release all the movies in the future. In. 3. D. Lucas! God damn you!!

Why can't his spleen take a hint from H2G2 and save our memories of this franchise before he destroys them all for reasons that I cannot even begin to comprehend. Don't say it's money, because that ain't so. He could be doing a better job with his SW legacy and make just as much or more than he is now. I think he hates us.

Monday, April 18, 2005

Enough already

Adobe (makers of PDF and Photoshop) have announced that they are going to devour the company known as Macromedia (makers of Flash and other junk). Joy.

I don't throw my lot in with the whole "corporations are evil" crowd, but this is not a good thing. It's not like the EA/NFL deal (which was initiated by the NFL for reasons known only to Lucifer); it may be worse.

Macromedia was Adobe's only competition in at least a couple spaces, such as image editing and web interface builders. This means effectively no competition for the new GoLive/Dreamweaver product, and likely, no innovation. The only good that could possibly come of this is if the Flash interface gets fixed, because right now it blows yaks. I'm not holding my breath. Hopefully the regulators will disallow this one.

Later in the day, videogame retailer Gamestop announced it's pending assimilation of videogame retailer Electronics Boutique. It's the hip thing to do, apparently.

Tomorrow I expect to read that Latigo Flint will be acquired by Blog Ho or LBB. Just Another Day will announce tomorrow the acquisition of Carnies Ain't Creepy. Rumors are that the site will be shut down, the existing content repurposed as a web comic and lots of t-shirts with obscure references for sale. There were also rumors of what might be done with Gil, but they're not fit to be repeated here.

Thursday, April 14, 2005

In case you were wondering...

...no, we are not dead.

...yes, we are very happy that the Lakers are officially out of the playoffs. But this does not end our "Down with KBB" mindset!

...yes, there will be Titanium Pimpsticks™ for sale here soon in this spot. Shill, shill, shill!

...no, and you don't want to, either.

...yes, he was a groovy kind of guy. Not perfect, but hey: who is?

...42. Don't you read?

...yes, she is a skank. Dating, shtupping and marrying a scumbag is skanky. It doesn't matter that she's currently married to the guy. This pregnancy just underlines the skankiness.

...Gil is dead.

...no he's not.

...that's right, we're coming to NYC in May for a bit. Or at least NYC-adjacent.

...yes, he is dead. If not, why isn't he posting?

...the new Beck is good. Buy it. No, not the beer. But it's OK to buy beer, too.

Monday, April 11, 2005

Shirt Update

We have sold two Suspicious Yak tees! This is great news, but apparently it's not enough to nurse Gil back to posting health.

So. Buy. More. Shirts.

(Or Western Union the carny some money. I think he's in Manitoba.)