Poster Review: Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close

What is this movie about? Good luck discerning anything from this poster. From the title, it's probably a concert film. From the look on the kid's face, it may be about an eating disorder. Nothing about this makes me want to find out.

One of the reasons this is such a disconserting image is because the hands are miserably Photoshopped over the kid's face. Go to a mirror, and try and replicate this. You can't, and it's not because you have bigger or smaller hands, or don't feel like throwing up at this moment. It's because it's an impossible pose. The hands are essentially floating over the plane the face is on, and the shadows are just miserable, the scale is wrong. It's surprising that this got approved, considering the pedigree of the film.

Comments

Clay and Adam are a couple of dorks.

But I certainly had nothing to do with this monstosity. Or did I?

How to write like a gossip columnist

Anyone can do it! Just keep in mind to never use your source's name, and always play up a celebrity's reaction to something using the following words: Blast Slam Fuming Here's an example: "Latigo Flint blasted reports that his guns do not actually fire live ammunition." Use them in combination!: "Gil slammed fellow carnie Sal's insinuation that he got a bit too personal with a badger. "It was cold and he wasn't even there!" the one-eyed Whack 'em Cats operator fumed." That's right, kiddies. Anyone can write a gossip column. And with the internet, anyone can publish it, too! p.s. Don't forget to put a salacious slant on everything. And blow things out of proportion, too. In fact, you may want to change your middle name to that.

Ruled by Secrecy

CONFIDENTIAL NEW BUSINESS PLAN Given the advancements in Organic Light Emitting Diode (OLED) technology, it is now possible to create the world's next great invention: The digital bumper sticker. See, OLEDs don't use a lot of voltage, can be almost paper-thin and are actually brighter than conventional LEDs using the same amount of power. This next generation bumper sticker (NGBS) will affix to your bumper or rear window as normal, but it will have a wireless connection to your cellular phone (WCTYCP). Flash memory (like in the iPod Shuffle) will keep each slogan displaying on the NGBS for at least 3 months without requiring a recharge/replacement. The advantages of this NGBS for the investor are so many as to boggle the mind, but I will outline a few for you: No more stale slogans. If your candidate lost, you can instantly update your Dennis Kucinich sticker to read "Don't Blame Me, I Voted Kucinich!" We think this will be a great revenue stream. After the l

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