Monday, January 31, 2005

A Sad Day

From Yahoo!:
Tara Reid and Christian Slater's scary movie "Alone in the Dark," [underachieved] with just $2.5 million, finishing well out of the top 10. [...]the movie stars Reid as an anthropologist and Slater as a paranormal investigator[...]

It is depressing when a deserving art film, such as Alone in the Dark fails to find the audience it deserves. The movie was a labor of love for all involved, with the actors working for scale. Directed by the visionary Uwe "Germany's Scorsese" Boll, the movie tells the heart-wrenching story of gumshoe (Slater) and the woman he loves (Tara "America's Kidman" Reid) as they fight for the future of the world against all odds. The cast is rounded out by Stephen "America's Anthony Hopkins" Dorff.

The movie has also missed out on the awards season, because unfortunately, it was not released in time for Oscar consideration because everyone involved wanted to get it right, no matter how long it took.

You've got to admire that.

For Slater, for whom this was a follow-up to 2004's 2004: A Light Knight's Odyssey, this was supposed to be his "Color of Money" and garner his first Best Actor nomination. He could not be reached for comment.

Reid, who had last been seen in the smash My Boss' Daughter had likewise been considered a front runner for Best Actress based on the early buzz the movie was getting. She plans to move onto her next project, Showgirls 2: The Cleavage Runs Deep, immediately.

And FearDotCom's Stephen Dorff, cast against type in this film as the gruff Commander Richards, has decided to retire from acting entirely since, "Americans just don't appreciate good films anymore."

7 comments:

Molicious said...

Totally laughing my butt off here. I still can't get over the whole Tara Reid as an educated human being thing. This movie is putting the game to shame.

Latigo Flint said...

You DO have to admire that, and thank you D. Moridin for bringing this gem to our attention.

I believe history will also come to recognize this film for its significant special effects breakthroughs, notably the Off-screen/Black Obscured Motion Render Engine.

Mike R. said...

Only 2.5 mil for Alone in the Dark with two brilliant thespians like Tara and Christian featured prominently?? You are right, this is a failure of American culture. If we were more enlightened like Europeans and Canadians we could appreciate the nuance of Christian Slater's acting and the sheer brilliance the great Tara Reid brings to a role.

Gil The Carnie said...

Seriously, cana' video game film adaptation truly be a labor of love? Okay, maybe Mario Brothers, but come on. And darthmoridin, please, whens Showgirls 2: The Cleavage Runs Deep cummin out, you tease!

Teaspoon said...

I am sorry but if we are going to be discussing video game based movies that are labor of love. We must talk about HOUSE OF THE DEAD. The makers of this movie cared so much for this movie that they did not even use a mainstream actor, let alone powerhouse actors such as Slater, Reid and Dorf, as that would have been too commercial and would have taken away from the artistic integrity of the film.

BTW - I can not say that HOTD was the worst movie ever made only because I have not seen every movie ever made, but it has got to be right up there.

Gil The Carnie said...

Funny thing. Uwe "The Creepy German" Boll directed both "Alone in the Dark Crap" and "House of the Dead Crap", sos it goes ta's show ya' if crap is left unattended it'll breed... and then worsen Christian Slater "movie" career.

darthmoridin said...

I think satire goes over the heads of carnies like an eagle over the Rio Grande.